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The day started off bright and early — I woke up at 5:30 AM to meet the tour bus, which attempts to depart early to beat Bangkok traffic.  Unfortunately, the bus didn't show up till around 7 AM, but at least it had the right idea.

Our first destination was a dock at some unspecified location.  There, we boarded a speedboat: 

The boat took us to the Floating Market at Damnoensaduak.  A bazaar on water, accessible by rowboat or foot, it defies anything you have ever seen in the West.  It is sad to see that today this cultural icon seems to cater only to Western tourists.  That said, it was an experience unlike any other on the tour.  [See the video]

After the Floating Market, we got in a bus and hit the road again.  After an hour or so, we arrived at some sort of snake zoo, where we witnessed the first of several canned Thai cultural shows we'd see throughout the rest of the day.  

As I watched these youngsters wrangling with all sorts of venomous snakes, I couldn't help but feel sad for them.  Who wants a life where you risk your life three or four times a day for the entertainment of an audience that probably doesn't even appreciate how difficult your job is?  Then again, it's not like "unskilled" laborers are any better off in the U.S.  

Before I let this section turn into a treatise on social justice, I'll move on...

Two stops and a bus change later, we arrived at the Samphran Elephant Ground and Zoo.  I feel that the poorly paid zookeepers aren't the only ones who live trapped lives; the lives of the animals they care for are also profoundly sad.  I especially felt this way during the elephant show, which involved costumed elephants kicking soccer balls and, during a simulation of Thai war, cringing under the heat of timed explosions.  Like the snake show, all this happens multiple times daily for the entertainment of a foreign audience.

Having paid for the tour, I was an implicit participant in the cycle of perpetuating these trapped lives.  But there was a lot more where that came from; next was up Samphran's crocodile show.

In case you're wondering, the last picture depicts a man inserting his head into a crocodile's mouth.

The next destination was the Rose Garden, where we saw few roses but many "Thai culture shows."  I've already made my feelings about these shows evident, but I have to admit that some of the performances were pretty neat.  Muay Thai, various Thai dance styles, and other cultural forms were put on display:

Videos: [Muay Thai]  [fighting]  [fighting]  [dance]

The final stop in the daylong parade of canned culture was an enormous diamond factory — or, in other words, the tour's one last attempt to squeeze dollars out of its clientele.  Unfortunately for them, I have nobody to buy diamonds for, so I went home.

Overall, this was probably one of my less favorite days in Thailand.  The Floating Market was neat, but there's really no substitute for having a local to show you real Thai culture.  Thank goodness for Avi, and thank goodness he ended up alright.  The next day would be one of the best on the trip. 

On 4 January 2005, it was 90°F during the day and 68°F at night.